The latest survey of the American public seems to lean more towards the “less casual” side of things — but not everyone’s down with monogamy. Do you have the flexibility to have casual sex with people who are a lot more important to you? Would a casual hookup be a disaster or a dream? Chime in and let us know.
The Best Casual Hookup Apps
1. Casual Dating
Get it? It’s a dating app.
Will it work for you? Casual dating works best for one of two types of people — the first being the people with a lot of steam left in the can, who just want to get laid, and the second being the people who have almost no libido at all. This is, obviously, the kind of person who reads Forbes. Casual dating has been trying to nail that sweet spot that balances intimacy and lack of commitment, and honestly, it’s really tough to do. Here’s the thing, the app takes a bit to set up, you have to pick your ideal distance from your potential partner (twenty miles? Casual touch?), and you have to know the basics of their sex schedule (where do they work and when do they actually get off?). But Casual Dating puts it all in a neat, easy to read interface that might make you want to message the very first guy you see. Their answer to your lack of desire might be to just give you some.
2. Casual Hookup
If casual dating leaves you feeling some sort of bodily emptiness, casual hookup is a direct remedy. Casual hookup is exactly what it sounds like — you pay for sexual access, and anyone that you decide to get your D on with is “casual,” with no expectations. It’s the hookup you’ve been waiting for — the one where you pay the service and still get to make all of the decisions. The services are free, ranging from the free-ish to the extravagant, but all of them have a basic eligibility questionnaire (like Casual Dating) to ensure that they only allow users to message people who are single.
There are many advantages of using dating apps. You might meet the love of your life using a casual hookup app. Some of the apps have verification process, like Match or OkCupid, to ensure you are not talking to a troll. Most of the apps also don’t charge extra fee, like your credit card.
3. Don’t Be Lonely.org
The third big casual hookup app is Don’t Be Lonely.
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There are a lot of myths around casual sex. One of the biggest ones is that it’s a “girl’s thing.” When people hear that casual sex is more common than marriage, or when their friends proudly report being sexually active and not in a relationship, a stereotype is born. But it’s not the case, all things being equal, that sex is “unmanly” and only an activity for straight men. If men are only in casual relationships for their sexual enjoyment (e.g. because they’re not sure if they want to commit to someone, or they’re just bored with their current partner), that’s not ok.

#2 Getting stuck in a pattern of hooking up

As the Internet is evolving, the casual sex market is also evolving. In my lifetime (a lifetime of 12-15 years now), the acceptance of sex outside of a serious, committed relationship has been incalculable. From the pictures in Cosmo to the sexual intimacy that is often portrayed in porn — heterosexuality has become normalised in many ways, but hookup culture is still a fringe culture.

If one believes the popular narrative that one should only have casual sex when single (the “one-night-stand” trope) and if one believes that men and women should only be in relationships, then the binary of committed versus casual becomes rigid and unapproachable for so many people.

The dating app has become a new playground. This is fantastic for people who are looking for casual sex (like myself). It’s easy to text a stranger, it’s quick, and it’s easy to blow your time and money quickly. However, the flip side to that is that this culture only offers casual sex as an option. To further draw a line between those who want to date someone and those who want casual sex only creates more pressure. Once someone is in an exclusive relationship, that exclusivity can have a positive effect on one’s views and attitudes about sex.

Embracing new attitudes toward casual sex allows us to stop limiting ourselves and embrace a more honest approach to sex. But casual sex still doesn’t benefit everyone, and many people can find comfort and value in an exclusive relationship. If you’re not committed to someone already, casual sex may not be for you.

Is casual sex bad for you?

But casual sex doesn’t

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